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by: James Kronefield

To Get What You Expect

Your parenting style is the most likely way you will impact how your child grows up. In being responsive to your children, you are simultaneously setting clear rules and limits for your children. This is crucial for you as a parent. You have likely based on this, identified the four main styles of parenting. There is no "right" or "wrong" parenting style and more to the point, there is more than one right way, though we all have prejudices on what we think works best based on our own life experience and values. Research, however, has charted the effects of the various parenting styles on children:

Just do it or else!

Many parents adopt a highly authoritarian, dictatorial style of parenting. They expect children to simply obey orders with no questions. Rules typically are well defined in such households and breaking those rules ultimately invites punishment. This type of system is highly typical in societies where little to no change is expected and deviance from this normal behaviour can be quite costly such as in rural or agrarian society.

Children that have grown up in this type of emotional environment tend to show average performance in school but lack spontaneity, effective social skills, and self-confidence.

A no means a no

Other parents are firm, assertive, and authoritative without being overly authoritarian. They set very clear rules, and are firm about the discipline without using any harsh punishment. Children in such homes are expected to be are typically are, socially responsible.

Children, who are brought up in this type of emotional environment tend to become more responsible. They highly capable and easily adjust to situations that demand cooperation.

Do anything you want

Parents engaging in this style of parenting believe in the permissive or indulgent approach. They demand very little responsible behaviour and frequently avoid confrontation with their children. This style was more popular with parents in the 50s and 60s.

Children who are brought up in this type of emotional environment tend to be more creative but some research indicates they may develop behavioural problems as they grow up because they tend not to accept responsibility.

I don't care what you do

Very rarely parents remain uninvolved in their children's lives, which can in many cases, border on neglect.

Children who are brought up in this type of emotional environment tend to perform poorly at school and frequently engage in criminal behaviour.

Jim Corbett

About The Author
James Kronefield

Do you need family and parenting advices? Get them at http://modernsocietyissues.com/

Events: Distance
Height: 5-10
Weight: 155
PRs: 3000i: 7:58.73 (2002); 5000: 13:35.08 (2002);
10,000: 28:26.91 (2000); Marathon: 2:14:29 (2003)
Born: May 4, 1979 in Ypsilanti, Mich.
Current Residence: East Jordan, Mich.
High School: Central Lake '97
College: University of Notre Dame '02
Coach: Joe Vigil
Agent: Ray Flynn
Club: Team USA California

Career Highlights: 2003 USA Marathon champion; 2003 & 2004 USA Half-Marathon champion; 2001 NCAA 10,000m champion; 2004 USA 20 km champion; 9-time NCAA All-American

Shay had another strong year in the marathon in 2005 highlighted by top 20 finishes at the Boston and ING New York City Marathons. After a tremendous 2003 campaign that saw him win the USARC road racing series in 2004, overzealous training caused a hamstring strain that hampered Shay throughout that season, he placed 23^rd at the Olympic Marathon Trials and 10^th in the 10,000m at the Olympic Trials later that summer in Sacramento. Earlier he successfully defended his USA Half-Marathon title and won the USA 20 km championship, in addition to setting personal bests in the 10,000 meters and marathon. One of eight children, Shay grew up amongst the blood of champions: eldest sister, Jodi Shay, still holds the 25 km national record for a 14-year oldolder brother, Cody, was the 97 NAIA national champ in 3000m steeplechase. Striving to take his own professional career toward the Olympic level, Shays post-collegiate competition began at the 2002 USA Track & Field Championships where he placed 7^th in the 10,000mhis success continued, winning the 2003 USA Marathon Championship in Birmingham, Ala. in 2:14:29 and the 2003 USA Half-Marathon Championship on June 7 in 1:04:13In his final collegiate season in 2002, Shay finished 2^nd in the 10,000m to 2001 cross country champion Boaz Cheboiywo to receive his 9^th All-American honorAt Notre Dame, the 9-time All-American (2 in cross country, 7 in track) had four consecutive top-10 finishes in the 10,000m at NCAA Championshipswas the schools first NCAA individual champion and the first BIG EAST cross country championholds the indoor and outdoor 5,000m and 10,000m school recordsindividually won four National Catholic cross country meet titlesAfter college, Shay joined Team USA California, an elite training group which includes Meb Keflezighi and Deena Drossin, and he currently lives in Alamosa, Colo. with Peter De La Cerda and his family to prepare for the World Championships Marathon in Parishe was a double major of economics and computer applications in collegehas future plans to attend chiropractic schoolis an avid fisherman.

2007: 15^th at USA Half-Marathon Champs (1:04:23)
2006: 3^rd at USA Marathon Champs (2:14:58)…6^th at USA 15 km Champs (44:42)…8^th at USA 20 km Champs (1:00:48)…best of 2:14:58.
2005: 11th at Boston Marathon (2:18:17)...18th at New York Marathon (2:17:14)...ranked #8 in U.S. by T&FN...best of 2:17:14.
2004: 23^rd at Olympic Marathon Trials (2:19:20)10^th at Olympic Trials 10,000m (28:49.95)USA Half-Marathon champion (1:05:04)USA 20 km champion (59:53)3^rd at USATF 10-Mile Championships (47:11)9^th at New York City Marathon (2:14:08PR)20^th at Stanford 10 km (28:18.81PR)runner-up at USA 5 km road championships (14:02)bests of 28:18.81PR & 2:14:08PR.
2003: USA Marathon champion (2:14:29PR)USA Half-Marathon champion (1:04:13)USARC series champion3^rd at USA 5 km championship (14:06)3^rd at USA 25 km championship (1:17:44)8^th at USA 15 km championship (45:22) did not finish World Outdoor Championships marathonranked #2 at marathon in U.S. by T&FNbests of 2:14:29 & 1:04.13.
2002: 6th at NCAA Indoor 5,000m (14:02.97); named All-American2^nd at NCAA Outdoor 10,000m (29:02.92)15^th at LaSalle Bank Chicago Marathon (2:14:30)7^th in 10,000m at USA Outdoors (28:40.66)bests of 13:35.08, 28:39.43 & 2:14:30.
2001: 1^st at NCAA Outdoor 10,000m (29:05.44)6^th in 5,000m NCAA Outdoor (13:52.45)4^th at Stanford Invite (28:40.03)10,000m BIG EAST Outdoor champ (29:17.61)5,000m BIG EAST Indoor champ (14:10.00); 2^nd in 3,000mbests of 13:52.45 & 28:40.03
2000: 7^th in 10,000m NCAA outdoor (29:55.78)... BIG EAST Outdoor 5,000m champ (14:42.91); 10,000m BIG EAST Outdoor champ (29:17.61)finished 10^th at Olympic Trials (28:52.74)bests of 14:08.31 & 28:26.91.
1999: Cross country All-American at NCAA Championships with 12^th (30:46.10)7^th in 10,000m at NCAA Outdoor Championships (29:55.78)bests of 14:02.35 & 29:01.59.
1998: Qualified for NCAA Cross Country Championships (34:16.80)1^st at National Catholic Championshipsqualified for NCAA Championshipscompeted for Team USA at World Junior Cross Country Championships (20^th of 200) to post highest finish by an American since 1992.

from : http://www.usatf.org/athletes/bios/oldBios/2006/Shay_Ryan.asp

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